I spent a decade drinking in secret. Night after night, after long days of pastoral ministry, I’d pour myself drinks to numb the stress and sadness I felt inside. On the outside, I was a successful pastor and theologian. On the inside, I was falling apart.
I know what it’s like to be enslaved by a substance you once thought you could control. I know the shame of preaching freedom on Sundays and drowning your sorrows in private. I know the terror of realizing you can’t get through a single day without alcohol. And I know what it takes, by the grace of God, to walk out of that darkness and into the light.
That journey is at the heart of my new book, Unshackled: Breaking Addiction’s Chains through God’s Grace. I wrote it because addiction remains one of the most devastating and stigmatized crises of our time, and because the church needs resources that are theologically deep, practically grounded, and written by someone who has lived it. I’ve written more than thirty books, but Unshackled is the most personal book I’ve ever written. It comes from the deepest and most painful part of my story.
My Story of Addiction and Recovery
The book opens with my own journey. I began drinking in my twenties, during my early years of pastoral ministry. The pressures of leadership, the emotional toll of caring for others, and my internal battles with anxiety and depression wore me down. I turned to alcohol as an escape. Only my wife, family, closest friends, and doctor knew the truth. I felt like a fraud.
The stigma and guilt were paralyzing. I told myself that a pastor was supposed to have it all together, that admitting my weakness would ruin my ministry. So I suffered alone, and my addiction worsened over time. I couldn’t go a couple of hours without a drink, and when I wasn’t drinking, thoughts about needing alcohol were ever present. After a decade of daily heavy drinking, my life was falling apart.
My turning point came on 23 July 2005. As I reflected on the imminent birth of another daughter, I asked myself whether I wanted to be alive to see her grow up. Did I want to know my daughters and my future grandchildren, or cling to alcohol and never have that chance? I chose life. I poured the remaining liquor down the drain and fell to my knees, weeping. I cried out to God for help because I knew I couldn’t break free on my own.
That same week, I visited my doctor, began seeing a psychiatrist and a Christian counsellor, and started developing healthier ways to cope. The early days of sobriety were filled with intense cravings, mood swings, and the temptation to go back to the bottle. But by God’s grace and with the support of my wife, family, friends, and church community, I stayed the course one day at a time.
On 23 July 2025, I celebrated twenty years sober. That milestone prompted me to write this book. Addiction professionals once told my wife to give up on me, that I’d never stop drinking. She refused. Her courage, patience, and love helped save my life.
A Book of Theology, Honesty, and Hope
Unshackled unfolds across eight chapters, a prologue, a conclusion, and six substantial appendices. Each chapter blends personal testimony, biblical reflection, theological depth, and practical wisdom for the recovery journey.
The prologue tells my full story of addiction and recovery: the secret drinking, the depression, the turning point, the long road to sobriety, and the moment in a seminary classroom when I finally shared my struggle publicly. That day, the shame lost its power. By stepping into the light, I experienced an overwhelming sense of relief and a profound sense of God’s grace.
The introduction addresses the crisis of addiction and the hope of freedom. I argue that addiction is both a medical reality and a spiritual crisis, a distortion of desire, a restless groping for transcendence in things that can never satisfy. The book holds together the necessity of practical recovery strategies (therapy, accountability, lifestyle change) with the indispensable power of Christian spirituality. Lasting transformation requires touching every layer of who we are: physical, emotional, psychological, relational, and spiritual.
The eight chapters trace a path from bondage to freedom. Chapter one begins with the hard work of recognizing the need for help: breaking through denial, counting the cost of what addiction has stolen, and discovering the spiritual void beneath the compulsion. Chapter two explores faith and surrender, what it means to entrust your broken pieces to the only One who can make them whole. Chapter three is about renewing the mind, replacing the lies that addiction carves into our thinking with the truth of Scripture. Chapter four addresses inner healing through confession, repentance, and cleansing. Chapter five explores the transforming power of grace and forgiveness, both received and extended. Chapter six tackles the painful, necessary work of rebuilding relationships and making amends. Chapter seven focuses on growing in Christ through new habits and holy living. And chapter eight turns to fellowship and purpose, discovering that recovery thrives in community and calling.
The conclusion reflects on what twenty years of sobriety have taught me: that recovery is a lifelong journey of growth and dependence on God, and that every milestone deserves celebration.
Grounded in Scripture and Theology
This book is unashamedly, deeply Christian. It’s rooted in Scripture, anchored in historic theology, grounded in ancient spiritual and discipleship practices, and propelled by the living presence of Jesus Christ.
I trace the theological foundations of addiction and recovery through the biblical story. Addiction reveals disordered love, a misdirected worship that echoes humanity’s primordial rupture with God. Our compulsions expose how desperately we long to fill the void that only divine communion can satisfy. As Augustine so piercingly confessed, “Our hearts are restless until they rest in you, O Lord.”
But the same theology that soberly names sin also erupts with good news. The story of Scripture is the story of a God who parts seas to liberate captives, who descends into our dust to lift us out, who takes on flesh to walk through death so we might walk free. In Christ, addiction’s deepest bonds are shattered at the cross, and new life is possible through resurrection. I linger extensively on themes like grace, forgiveness, and sanctification, because the addicted soul is often tormented by self-hatred and shame. These themes needed space to breathe.
Throughout the book, I engage with profound biblical metaphors: being born again, putting off the old self, abiding in the vine, experiencing death and resurrection, walking in the light. These serve as the spiritual architecture of transformation.
Practical Tools for the Recovery Journey
One of the features I’m most proud of is the book’s six appendices, which together form a comprehensive recovery toolkit.
Appendix A walks readers through the 12 Steps from a distinctly Christian perspective, showing how each step connects to Scripture and spiritual practice. Appendix B engages with modern addiction research, bridging the gap between faith and science. Appendix C addresses the societal and structural factors that perpetuate addiction, recognizing that individual recovery exists within broader systems of inequality, stigma, and injustice. Appendix D provides self-assessments and inventories for the recovery journey. Appendix E offers tools for sponsors, mentors, and support groups. And Appendix F provides Scripture meditations and prayers designed for daily use in recovery.
Every chapter also concludes with reflection questions and action steps, making the book immediately useful for personal devotion, small groups, recovery programs, and pastoral care.
Written from Within Real Life
I want to be honest: I haven’t written this book from above the fray. I’ve lain awake at night, unsettled by memories of my years of drinking. I’ve caught myself in seasons where depression returned, and I had to reach for the practices and relationships that keep me grounded. I carry scars. I’ve sat with the weight of knowing how close I came to losing everything: my family, my ministry, my life.
I wrote this book as a theologian, a pastor, a father, and a person in recovery. I write as someone who knows what it’s like to feel both deeply at home in God’s grace and haunted by the memory of bondage. That tension shapes every page. I hope that the result feels like a wise friend sitting across the table, helping you think through something that matters deeply.
I also write with what I call practical humility. I’m not a clinical expert in addiction medicine or a credentialed psychologist. I come alongside as a spiritual guide, a fellow pilgrim who knows what it means to limp toward wholeness. I urge readers to seek therapy, medical care, and structured programs alongside the spiritual practices this book describes. Recovery required both prayer and therapy for me, both faith and medicine. There’s no shame in using all the tools God provides.
Built for Groups and Shared Reading
Unshackled is designed for community use. The reflection questions and action steps at the end of every chapter work for personal devotion, book clubs, small groups, recovery programs, men’s and women’s groups, church ministry teams, and pastoral training. The appendices equip sponsors, mentors, and group leaders with practical resources they can use immediately.
I’ve designed it as a resource that can be returned to again and again, in whatever setting people gather to talk about addiction, recovery, and the grace of God.
Who Should Read This Book
Unshackled is written for anyone caught in the grip of addiction who longs for freedom. It’s for people struggling with alcohol, drugs, pornography, gambling, food, screens, work, or any compulsive behavior that has taken control. It’s for the family members and friends who love someone in addiction and want to understand what they’re going through. It’s for pastors and church leaders who need a theological and practical framework for walking alongside people in recovery. It’s for counsellors, mentors, sponsors, and support group leaders who want resources grounded in both faith and evidence. And it’s for anyone who has ever felt too broken, too far gone, or too ashamed to believe that freedom is possible.
If you’ve tried to stop and failed, if you’ve carried your struggle in secret, if you’ve wondered whether God still sees you and cares, this book was written for you.
An Invitation
I know how lonely addiction feels. I know the shame of hiding, the exhaustion of pretending, the terror of believing you’ll never be free. I lived in that darkness for a decade. And I can tell you, from the other side, that freedom is real. It’s hard won. It’s a daily choice. And it’s sustained by a grace that has never once run out.
The journey I describe in this book didn’t happen overnight, and it didn’t happen alone. It happened in the company of a faithful God, a courageous wife, a patient church community, skilled therapists, and honest friends who refused to let me disappear into my addiction. It happened one day at a time, one prayer at a time, one honest conversation at a time.
Twenty years of sobriety have taught me something I couldn’t have believed in those early, trembling days: your story of bondage can become a story of freedom. Your scars can become testimony. Your pain can become the very thing that gives someone else the courage to reach for help.
If you take one thing from this book, let it be this: you aren’t beyond the reach of grace. The God who breathed life into you is still breathing, still guiding, still shaping you for good works and holy purpose. What you thought was ruin has become the soil of redemption.
The invitation stands. Come as you are. Addicted, afraid, ashamed, and half believing. Grace has always specialized in meeting us in our wilderness and leading us home.
Unshackled: Breaking Addiction’s Chains through God’s Grace is available now.
Amazon Australia link: https://amzn.asia/d/0dtn0PBE
Amazon US link: https://a.co/d/0gsj9acW
